In 1986…
...I was a wild-brained, wild-haired ingénue - a “celebrity,” starring in her own television series.
I had money
A house off Mulholland
I was 5 years clean and sober
I was also out of my mind
I couldn’t enjoy the present moment, let alone all the things that were supposed to make me so-called happy: fame, career and possessions, close friends and family. My best times were spent either compulsively shopping (since it was the 80s, I basically invested my money in shoulder pads) or holed up in the bedroom with my journal composing awful poems romanticizing my complaints and anxieties.
Then I went to see Dr. Phil Stutz…
Instead of letting me go on and on about my terrible childhood for an hour like all the other shrinks, he let me blather for two woe-is-me minutes before saying, “Okay, shut the f**k up.” I wasn’t offended – I was relieved. On some level, I knew my endless talking about my problems was killing me.
Over the next few years, Phil changed my f**king life.
From that very first session, Dr. Stutz provided solutions. He called them The Tools®.
Thirty years later, instead of writing bad poetry and collecting Dynasty-inspired power suits, I have a large group of friends with whom I’m deeply connected. I love and show up for my aging mother – my adored father died from Alzheimer’s – and I’m in a wonderful relationship.
I’ve been lucky to have had an amazing acting career. I’ve danced tango all over the world. I wrote a self-help book/memoir called “Shut Up and Dance!” (guess who that title was inspired by) – but the work I find most rewarding is sharing the mental exercises and philosophical system developed by Dr. Stutz.
Phil is both mentor and colleague. I coach The Tools® now; sharing this deep, important work has made me happier than I could have imagined – especially when I think of the young woman of three decades ago, who looked as if she had “everything.” On the outside…
If you want to learn more about The Tools®, check out the book by Phil Stutz and his co-author Barry C. Michels here.
And if you’re ready to shut the f**k up and move forward in your life, give me a shout.
